Wednesday 18 September 2013

Sprechen Sie Baby?

I may have mentioned it before but Mummy isn't great on speaking Baby and so I have had to take up several alternative methods of communication. 
In the beginning, I tried to explain some really important phenomena to her.  All I got back were those damn raspberries.  I thought they meant something really meaningful so would blow them at her and instead of paying attention to what I was saying, Mummy would laugh at me.  Very annoying. 
You're not listening Mummy
The same thing happened with coughing.  I got into trouble for coughing because another small person was chatting to me in coughs and Mummy thought I was clowning about and imitating them.
I then spent ages perfecting my Elfdalian with a touch of Khoisan.  Disappointingly, this was of no use here as Mummy doesn't know any Swedes or Bushmen. So I have now added pointing.  My Great Uncle Joe showed me the finger.  He is always waving it about.  That is going fairly well but Mummy is always bringing me the wrong thing.  She can never see exactly what I am pointing at even though it is pretty damn obvious.
So I have added 'THAT' and when she gets warmer 'THAT THAT THAT THAT THAT' building up to a crescendo which usually gets her attention.  However, Mummy can never see when I am pointing at Birdy Num Nums.  They get in the way.  She thinks I am pointing at her and picks me up when I don't want her at all.  I want feeding. So I have added 'THIS' - specifically for Birdy Num Nums to prevent any further confusion.  When I am nursing, I stop from time to time, point at them and say 'THIS' and check she understands.
Now that we have cleared 'that' up, I have moved onto 'Yesthsh'.  Daddy says I sound like 'Sylvester' but he should try it with only 5 teeth.  I only say 'Yesthsh' though when I am answering the telephone, television remote control, a camera or this morning, a banana - or when I am really, really hungry.
Speaking of hunger, Mummy tried to fob me off with yet another meal of lentils this lunchtime and I spotted that she was eating garlic mushrooms on toast and I have just discovered that I loooooooooooooove mushrooms.  YESTHSH!!!!!!

Mummy says I sound like a hedgehog chewing a slug.  Lip Smaken Uncle Ivo.  Lip Smaken!

1 comment:

  1. No communication complaints from me, Little One. I understand you perfectly and I always know exactly what you're pointing at. I even love your Violet-Elizabeth Bott lisp. Very becoming (although you really need to lose it by five). Let's Skype soon, when you can point to everything new you have discovered.

    All my love, Junior.

    guj

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Joe loves to get post (and presents) and post