Thursday, 29 August 2013

Am goin' to shake, shake, shake,shake, shake then stop

Mummy took me to a local play group this afternoon and insisted I make a shaker.  I had no interest in making one but Mummy wanted to show off her creativity - so I sat there with her so she didn't feel stupid being the biggest at the table.  Anyhow, she spent hours choosing stickers.  She kept pretending that I was choosing them but I didn't give a damn whether she put a dolphin or a horse on the bottle.  Then she got done off the lady for trying to put the rice in herself instead of waiting in the rice queue for the lady to do it.  Mummy is always trying to find a shortcut.  Why can't she just do what everyone else does? Anyhow I was more interested in the lady.  She had red hair and bright red smudged paint round her mouth which was on her teeth.  She kept asking me why I was staring at her but I didn't like to say.  Mummy kept nudging me to stop.  She knew why. 
After about half an hour of waiting Mummy finished her shaker.  It was crap.  Mummy wouldn't put it down.  She wanted me to join in the shake dance with the Red Lady but I thought it was stupid so she had to do it by herself.  I don't think Mummy minds making a fool of herself.  I pretended I was related to some Indian Nana who was very nice and had some watermelon and sat still and wasn't dancing with a Coca Cola bottle filled with rice.
Well I finished all the watermelon and wandered off to the sand pit which I particularly like and Mummy came to find me.  She sat down with me and began to sieve sand nicely when she let go of her shaker.  In a blink, a small person appeared and grabbed hold of it.  I have to say Mummy has got some spring loaded reactions.  She snatched it back sharpish.  But the boy was quicker.  He grabbed it back and Mummy and he were having a bit of a tug of war.  Mummy won but not before the boy pulled a leg off her horse sticker and made off with it (the leg - not the shaker disappointingly).  Mummy was fuming.  I don't know why she just didn't give it to him.  She couldn't say anything thank goodness because the other Mummies were watching.
She still has the hump about her shaker and the horse with three legs. 

I wouldn't be seen dead holding it

Mummy it's a Coca Cola bottle filled with rice with a bit of insulation tape round the cap.  We can make you another if you like.

Sunday, 25 August 2013

Brave New World

Hello There

Don't fence me in
Well here I am back in London and it is all terribly strange and terribly exciting.  I run from room to room to check if everything is still there.  Things do look a lot smaller.  I have been to worship at the Head of the Lion every morning and I miss Nana.  I just can't go to sleep as the world is just too exciting.  There is so much to see and do and so little time to do it.  Mummy thinks I am asleep and I sit bolt upright and smile.  Mummy says I need to calm down.  I also have another tooth poking through (that makes 5) and it is giving me toothache and making me chew Daddy's shoulder which he doesn't like very much.
So much has changed since we've been away.   I've developed a new trend in crawling.  It involves feet and hands (no knees) and my bum in the air.  I can move sideways at quite a rate of knots.  I noticed that Nana was copying me when I was with her and Mummy has taken it up too.  I can also run at high speed but I need to be hold of someone's hand.  This walking business - I haven't quite mastered but 'You should never walk alone'.  Oh and they have fenced me in!  I now have a gate across the top of the stairs which I have already tried to climb over and they have fenced off the fire place.  Mummy says the knobs on the cooker are out of bounds and Daddy won't let me play in the bin since he caught me trying to drink out of an empty beer bottle.  I think that those two may turn out to be not-too-much-fun after all.

All Washed Out
Also Mummy has lost the plot.  She put a liquid soap tablet into the soap drawer of the washing machine this morning and when she switched it on - water poured out all over the floor.  And she tried to blame me as I am always messing around with the washing machine door.  Nana says that I'm going to get my fingers trapped but I just don't care.

Anyway, they did find me this fantastic music video so I can at least have a dance.

Monday, 19 August 2013

Cummings and Goings

There's been a lot of Cummings and Goings recently and I'm not sure I like it.  First we left Daddy in London and came to Nana's and my cousin Sienna was here.  Then she left and went home.  Then my Daddy came.  Then Nana and Granddad left and went to London.  Then Mummy says that we will be going back to London on Friday.  Then Mummy said I shouldn't keep starting the sentence with 'then'. 
I don't mind moving about places.  I just miss my family.  Sometimes when I am sitting playing happily I get a really sad thought.  It's a good job I have Fiona.  I have to admit though, that since Daddy has been here I love Fiona a little bit less.

Friday, 16 August 2013

Five Favourite Free Things to do (if you don't spend a fortune in restaurants) in Dolly Dorset

Number 1 The playground at Tolpuddle.
My best Swing
  This is the first time that I have been sooooo high on a swing.  There is a small fenced area for toddlers like me to stop me escaping to the pub and a larger area with football goals/basketball hoop and a very exciting adventure climbing frame. 
Trying to climb before I can walk
Mummy likes it because it is always quiet (she won't be happy that I've blogged about it) and it is very green and there is no tarmac or metal to be seen anywhere.  I like it because it is so big and there are nice wood carvings in the fence and I can explore on my own.  Mummy has found a selection of wooden toadstools under the small slide where she can feed me when it rains.
I usually drive my chariot through the village but the pavement runs out and I get to drive in the road which is OK as it is quite quiet.  Some people come in their parents' chariots as there is plenty of free parking outside.  There are no toilets but plenty of bushes and a pub in the village which Mummy hasn't tried as she seemed to find it hard work to get a anything to eat at ten to two.  (Mummy isn't very tolerant of people who think they should be going home to their families when she thinks they ought to be making her lunch).  There is also a play group in the Village Hall ( abit further along than the pub) on Mondays from 10-12 am.

Number 2 Bowleaze Cove/Weymouth.

Most Mummies have a pop up tent.........
  Mummy parks for free on the hill on Bowleaze Causeway but you can also park in the Beach Leisure Park Car Park for £2.50 for 4 hours or £5.00 all day. If you want to eat anything fried then there is a café at the Leisure Park with baby change facilities (ask for the key).  Or you can walk back up over the hill towards Weymouth where there is a nice café on the hill The Look Out Café with great views (even for short people) and a nice grassed area into which you can rub your crab sandwich.  If you continue down the hill towards Weymouth there is also the Spyglass pub with excellent value food (no haute cuisine but huge platefuls of roast dinner) and again good views.  We usually go onto the beach here as it is less crowded than at Bowleaze.  There are also free public toilets opposite the pub at the bottom of the hill.  If you fancy driving your chariot then you can drive it all the way along the front to Weymouth but we have struggled to find anywhere good to eat there which fulfils our criteria 1.  edible food 2. not overly expensive 3. room for a pram 4.  room for breast feeding 5.  room to change my nappy 6.  and mummy wants me to add not too hot as being from the North she always has to have a window open.  Let us know if you do (find somewhere good - not have a window open).

Mummy doesn't just go to the beach when it's sunny
3.  Sandbanks has to be the best beach for getting sand up your bum.  It is also fantastic for paddling and flying kites.  Mummy keeps saying she must buy a windbreak every time we go though.  Mummy gets free parking on the some of the roads off Shore Road and then we take the pram (most mums say buggy) to the beach.  There is a café on the beach Jazz Café but Trip Advisor says that it has a 'no buggy policy'.  Hmm - check it out.  We always go to eat at Lochfyne as Mummy loves fish and there is a £12 for 3 courses lunch deal.  There is changing room for me and if the car park is full you can park on the street opposite.  Mummy fancies walking along the front to Bournemouth but hasn't done it yet.

4.  Holesbay Poole
Rather a bleak scene
 A bit of an odd one this one but Mummy parks in Upton Park and we walk around Holesbay with the pram.  (Upton Park has a lovely walled garden and café and is nice in itself.)  Great chariot ride with some exciting bird hides but a bit close to the nioisy road in some places.  Can't have it all.  Some park benches en route for Mummies to nod off on.  It takes just over an hour to get to Asda Poole where there are fabulous changing rooms and free nappies for me.  The café has sofas round the back which are great to partake of the old Birdy Num Nums if you don't mind the glass windows giving great views both inside and out.  Food in the café is dreadful but you could always buy a picnic to eat on the way back or go into Poole.  Mummy's favourite ice cream shop has just opened a branch here Giggi's

5.  Bournemouth

The Trees and the Flowers and Me
Me and a bloody big balloon
I do like Bournemouth.  It is such a gentile seaside town.  Daddy says he finds English seaside towns depressing but Bournemouth seems so vibrant.  Anyhow, you can park for free in this area and then walk along the river Bourne through the park into the centre of town.  There are plenty of toilets both in the centre of town and then in the park down towards the sea.  There is also the most fantastic Italian ice cream shop in Bournemouth Giggi which Mummy adores.  There also seems to be plenty going on in the Summer for free and it is worth checking this website before visiting  When we were there were entertainers in the park and live music and dance on the front.  I danced in the waves and slept on the sand.  Mummy sometimes eats at Wagamama's as there are small person facilities and chopsticks for me to poke in my eye.

Wednesday, 14 August 2013

I love Fiona

I don't know what it is about her but I am obsessed with Fiona.  I can't say' Mummy' yet or 'Daddy' but I can say 'Dog' and I can say 'Lager' and now I can say 'Fiona' .  (At a push I can also give you the recipe in Swedish for meatballs.)   She lives in Nana's hallway and I rush to see her when I get up in the morning calling 'Fiona, Fiona'.  She sometimes answers back but when she does, it doesn't half sound like Mummy putting on a squeaky voice.
I do love Mummy but there is something about Fiona.  Yesterday afternoon I blew her nose and I thought this was the funniest thing which has happened all day. And then this morning she kissed me ...................

Me and Fiona

Friday, 9 August 2013

Note to Mummy

Mummy please stop faffing.  You can guarantee that whenever I am enjoying myself you will come along and kill the joy.  Just when I am about to go to sleep don't pull a cover over my head and wake me.  When I am having a good time trying to push my finger down the plug hole, please don't try to pull that piece of snot from my nose which has been annoying you all afternoon.    I don't want to have to call you No Fun Mummy.
When I am eating a potato, I don't want you to take it off me to remove the hair ball.  I am enjoying it.  Hairs and all.  When I am standing in the sea watching the waves, I don't need you to take my vest off.  I like to get wet sand all over me.   When I am driving along in my chariot and I am people watching, don't faff with the hood and put it over me - you are ruining my view.  And when I nod off in the car seat with my head at a dislocated angle, I don't appreciate you straightening it for me.  Mummy, when I have spent all say eating nothing but nectarines, don't take the seventh one from me and give me a 3 course meal.  If I wanted a 3 course meal, I would ask for one.
And Mummy, when I am trying to get to sleep, stop stroking my chuffing cheek.  OK?

Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Ode to Nana

"Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see just you all day and now the day was complete."

 Mary Mapes Dodge
Mummy wanted to come and stay with Nana so she can set up this blog for me.  She says it will be something for me to look at when I get older.  Mummy spent all day in Nana's hut on the computer and it rained really hard.  It always rains when we come to Dorset.  Daddy says he is in a heat wave in London and we are wearing socks and jumpers here.  In fact Mummy put shoes on me today.  I hate those shoes.  I spent most of the afternoon trying to scuff them off. Nana's hut has a Perspex roof and Mummy emerged this evening shell shocked from the noise.
Researching my blog in Nana's hut

I spent the day playing with Nana.  Nana always plays great games.  She sat me on the worktop so I could watch her bake.  She pressed my foot into a piece of pastry and baked my footprint.  In fact she was so busy playing with me that she forgot to put any sugar in the rhubarb pie.  Mummy pulled a big face when she tried it.
I do hope Nana and Granddad come to visit us often when we are travelling.  Mummy said that until she had me, she thought she was too old to have any more need for her Mummy.  Nana came to the rescue when I was born and Mummy couldn't feed me.  Mummy said she couldn't stop crying for a week.  She even cried when  Barry Cryer sang 'I can't live (If living is without you)' on 'I'm Sorry I haven't a clue'.  Mummy used to think this was the funniest program in the world.  And then she cried because she cried.  She just needed to look at me to start crying.  I don't think she knew what her feelings were doing.  I'm so glad she has stopped that now.  Most of the time anyway.  It's so embarrassing.  Sometimes she looks at me in a weird way when she thinks I'm sleeping.
Anyway, Mummy says that Nana saved our lives.  Now I see her every month and I miss her when she is not there.  She is not grumpy like Mummy can be and she doesn't make me eat fruit but lets me eat biscuits when Mummy isn't watching.  And she lets me pull her hair and wee on the carpet.  She calls it fairy water.   She isn't obsessed about me having a poo.  And she pushes me for hours on the swings and makes up silly games and talks to me all the time.  She tells me all her secrets and doesn't whisper them like Mummy and Daddy do when I've gone to bed.
Mummy says that Nana lets me do all the things that she wasn't allowed to when she was little.  She says that Nana's 'changed'.  Nana just laughs.  She tells me that I'm a good boy and calls me a little cherub and doesn't mind when I rub tangerine into her nice clean blouse.

Nana and Me watching the birds